TJ’s Journey

To our friends and the wonderful people who have touched our lives who have become friends,

As you know, TJ and I have been on an incredible journey over the last few years trying to heal him. If you are reading this then you have either been our support system and/or been one of the many angels who have brought him back to me.

When TJ was first diagnosed a doctor told me, my mother and brother that he would be institutionalized and we needed to learn to love him anyway. She said that I could try whatever I want, but she didn’t believe it could work. I ignored her and prayed every night for G-d to give me my baby back. My immediate family kicked in like no one could ever believe. The day before, when my brother first heard there was definitely a problem he was on an airplane to ___, taking family leave in a matter of minutes. He created a notebook into the morning hours, compiling an incredible wealth of information, stories, therapy information, schools, etc. My sister in law piled her 1 ½ and 3 ½ yr olds into the car and took off for ___ (She loves TJ so much you would think my sister in law gave birth to him herself). When the therapies began my mother and father helped schlep all over town to get him to therapy. Meanwhile, I tried to keep my job and sanity (insert obvious joke if desired!).

And still I kept praying “G-D please give me my baby back and I will pay it forward, I promise. Please G-d. Please G-d. I am begging!” G-d heard me and put PB, Dr. LLS and MT into my life; my compass points that sailed the two of us across this crazy turbulent ocean. But from these three we were guided to all of the right places, where I met many of you. My goal was to recover TJ by the time he went to Kindergarten. Many thought this was too lofty, but I ignored that, too! I guess all those years that many of you have seen me as an assertive, strong women with very high expectations can all realize now that it was merely practice to prepare me for healing my son. In the beginning I read an article entitled “Autism is not the Enemy.” I couldn’t DISAGREE more. My mantra became AUTISM IS THE ENEMY AND I AM GOING TO WIN!”

So why am I writing to you now?

Because on Friday TJ was no longer deemed Autistic by his school district. He no longer requires any services. A psychologist evaluated him and said that he is heads above the other typical children in class. She reported that he is the leader in play, surrounded by little girls who love to play near him. His social/emotional skills are at age level. He has a sense of humor above age level. His tests show his receptive and expressive skills at 6 yrs 11 months (He just turned 5!). He received the same score for reading and math skills. Her concern is which school we could possibly put him into that would challenge him since they have no GATE (gifted) program for kindergarten in the district.

On Thursday, my son who previously had no upper body strength, climbed 7 feet up a rope by himself and did flips on the uneven parallel bars. Last spring, Dr. LLS told us that the last of his quirks would be gone by 8 yrs old, and that he is fine. Last Fall his Regional Center Behavior therapists said goodbye because he was done. His pediatrician also said he is recovered. New friends meet him and don’t believe he was ever anything but social, chatty and OUTGOING. He wants to be with the party and the life of the party.

G-d and all of you helped give me my baby back and for that I am eternally grateful.

With love, PA
Elated mom
Parent advocate, paying my promise forward

Dynamic Family Support

I wanted to thank all the staff at Stepping Stones.  It was so wonderful to be there today, and I was VERY impressed by the cohesiveness of your group.  It is thrilling to be part of your team, and the dynamic energy that resonated during the staff training today.  ”DB” and I are daily grateful for your devotion to serving “DS”, and all of the other children that are fortunate to be part of your program.  Additionally, the support you give to families allows us to help others that may not be as lucky as we are to have your services.  We appreciate all you do, and the dedication each of you, and the others, clearly devote to the mission of educating children with autism.  It is also clear that your training to the families helps us with our other children, as ABA is great parenting!

The piece I didn’t mention today, and had intended to, is how Stepping Stones has grown as an agency, continually improving your processes, including data collection, long and short term goal criterion, and staff training, to ensure maximum efficiency and development by both staff and clients. I am still feeling the good will that DS and I.

Letters to the Director:

Dear Vivian,

I have wanted to congratulate you on your many ventures, and the growth of your agency. I am so happy that so many more families around the country, and world, will benefit from the wonderful work your agency does….Not only has your agency exceeded my original high expectations, I have continued, over several years, to be delighted and impressed with how professional you and your team are. I have had one other consultant prior to my current one who has been on our team for several years and have been individually impressed with each therapist on the team. The prior consultant was incredibly dedicated, and smart, and was a terrific beginning. When the current consultant came on board, he continued the excellent supervision, and has done an amazing hands-on job ever since, always available, and quick to make a change when needed. I was quickly very happy with the direction your agency was able to take my son’s programming, and realized shortly after becoming clients, that this was the way it should be.

Thank you to the current consultant’s dedication, and perseverance, and very excellent behavioral skills, along with the well trained therapists, DH has made tremendous progress and looks like a completely different child. He is much better at using appropriate language, and has made progress with his reading and math, and other skills that will help him continue to grow toward being the most independent adult possible. The therapists are so wonderful, and are so competent, they also add much input to the specific programming needs of my child. They are incredibly punctual, reliable, and honest, I have loved each therapist, and cried when they moved on, but have known the replacements would be wonderful in their unique way.

I think you have done an amazing job here in the bay area, and am very proud to be affiliated with an agency as yours, that really does the best for each individual client, and continues to operate driven by the mission of your agency, and has maintained seamless integrity, consistent staff that is well trained and professional, incredible administrative support from Debbie, who is amazing with everything, and so quick to respond, to Heidi and Jaime that do scheduling and other things, to Olivia who answers the phone with a smile. Additionally, you, as director have always been available during difficult or unusual junctures, and have been supportive and encouraging. I cannot say enough about how blessed my husband and I know we are, and we thank you and your team individually and as a group. The monthly staff meetings you hold, the recognition of employees, and the continued opportunity for training, offered by you and our current consultant seems to lead to the excellent attitude of your staff, and dedication they have to your clients.

***

Dear Vivian,

I just wanted to take the opportunity to thank you for everything you’ve done for our family. Where to even begin … your organization has completely changed the life of my little KJ. When I think back to where we were just a year and a half ago, it’s just incredible. KJ has come so far in such a short time, thanks to the amazing staff and program. He’s doing things and saying things that I never would have thought possible last year! We were so lost when he was diagnosed, and just completely afraid and uncertain about what to do, or where to turn. Then he started with Stepping Stones, and it was like an oasis in the desert. It grounded us, gave us hope and changed our son for the better! It’s an incredible program, and such a caring, dedicated staff. I really couldn’t ask for any better. I feel so blessed to have met everyone from Stepping Stones, and to have been able to keep his program going for so long. It’s his lifeline, really. I can’t imagine our lives without Stepping Stones!

There were so many times and so many ways where you personally went above and beyond to help us. Your personal involvement was very touching, and always helpful. I’m so impressed by you, and your dedication to maintaining a quality program with a personal touch. I can’t think of enough nice things to say, and just couldn’t be any more thrilled with the experiences I’ve had with your company. Any time I meet a new parent with an autistic child, I always want to jump right in and say “CALL STEPPING STONES!!”…. It’s so exciting to see KJ move into the “real world” and see him using the skills he’s gained at home. I consider his therapists as almost part of our family. Before he started therapy, I remember thinking that it would be so intrusive, having strangers in my home taking over my child’s education. But that couldn’t be any further from how I feel now. I love our “girls”, and am so thankful every day that you created this great organization. You will always be in my thoughts, and you have our family’s deepest gratitude always!

***

We just got back from our family trip and we had a wonderful time. The boys were great and we’re so proud of UA with regard to potty training….that was the only thing that we were a bit stressed about with a long trip overseas. Be he did it! My husband and I had a lot of time to reflect about UA’s progress and delight in is budding personality. Of course, that leads us to this past year and all the amazing therapy, patience and love he has received from his team at Stepping Stones. We know that UA and our family could not have done it without them. We feel so blessed to have had the experience to work with each and every person we’ve come across at Stepping Stones. I’m hoping you don’t mind indulging me as I give personal kudos to his team:

AB: WOW, what can I say…My eyes immediately start to water as I type her name…she got this little man to finally talk!! AB tapped into something that no one else could. His little world took a major turn when he met AB. She takes her job and role very seriously and I am very grateful. Her idea of starting off with Links to Language was an incredible idea and it did wonders for him in terms of learning how to learn. I wished I could be there everyday and see how their day goes. Because sometimes it appears that things just magically happen, but I know different. I know it is the result of hard work and lots of patience. I love AB’s organizational skills and her notes that I get everyday telling me how UA did. I also love how determined she is and how fiercely loyal and committed she is to UA and all the children. I am in awe of her determination and her drive to succeed, she makes it personal and in this case, it has great benefits!!

KB: I don’ t know many people who have the rare combination of being mellow and energetic at the same time. I’m sure everyone will agree when I say that KB has this amazing way of being so positive, so loving and so hard working and focused all at once. Not to mention the fact that she is so easy going and not much seems to ruffle her feathers. She has an amazing energy about her that really draws people in. UA is one of those lucky people. KB brings out something in UA that is truly special. He lights up when he sees her and they hit it off right away…they simply just love to be together and get so much accomplished in the process.

JT: Big sigh…As I write this JT is no longer on UA’s case. Which is bittersweet because she has been there from the beginning of our journey with UA. But I know that I can only have so many amazing senior therapists on UA’s team at once!! I remember times when UA was trying to understand how to just sit for 5 seconds so that he could be taught how to learn…JT’s stamina and patience were amazing! She would not give up or would not let UA get away with not doing it right. She remained calm, consistent and refused to leave until UA finished what they set out to accomplish. I am still in awe of those first few home therapy sessions and how impressed I was with JT.

TM: Just when I thought that I had all the great therapists at Stepping Stones already on UA’s team, along came TM. When she came aboard we were in the middle of potty training UA. We were about 5-6 months into it and I was starting to get a little wacky! TM brought many fresh ideas that were very welcome and they worked!! TM is a very loving and creative person and is a pleasure to work with. She brought so much to UA’s work and I so appreciated her down-to-earth disposition. With TM there never seemed to be any problems… only solutions. She was a great team player and she will be greatly missed.

HF: It was love at first sight for HF and UA. They absolutely love working with each other . HF is amazing with UA…she’s playful, yet firm and is very eager to see results. It is such a blessing for me when someone who works with UA loves their job and HF seems to have a passion for what she does. After UA comes out of therapy with HF, he looks like he’s just had a day at the spa, even though I know he’s worked hard. I think she charms him into it!!

ST: ST is UA’s lifeline at the “big boy school” next door. Of course, UA has no idea he is different from the other kids and I know ST makes sure he keeps up with the kids as best as he can. I find so much comfort in knowing that she is helping to guide him and encourage him to interact in a way that makes him more independent. She is wonderful at giving me such great detail in how UA’s day went and exactly what he did. I’m so impressed with ST and I know the teacher’s at his preschool are too.

SY: My wing-man or rather my wing-woman. I still marvel everyday at the fact that a position such as SY’s exists. Add t that, a person who works with so much care and focus to keep this team moving smoothly….it just blows my mind. SY is the consummate professional, yet she remains totally approachable and down-to-earth. I feel like I can call her about anything without being judged. She is very diplomatic and manages to stay very objective. I also know that she cares very much about UA and makes sure he is getting what he needs.

There is always so much more that I want to say, but can’t always find the words. I hope that each team member knows how important they are to me and my family. I absolutely love that each person’s personality is different and they each bring out amazing and different qualities in UA. The dedication and perseverance of each team member and at Stepping Stones is still an inspiration to me every day. I knew UA had it in him to get through this, but when he didn’t have was the right team of people to help him flourish. We are so grateful to have all of you on our side. UA is one lucky little dude!!